email, nov 2005: 'From the ballroom of this existence because there is nothing more'
email, dec 2005:"i don't think i'll move beyond these things ever. i don't know who i'd be if i did. but for me to create and exist and be happy i have to forget these things for a moment or two once in awhile. when i forget, i am alive. when i forget, i wonder, i am fascinated with everything; when i stop worrying there are a few moments where i scramble for the pen to scratch a few things down. soon i begin worrying again, but those scratches are still there. they bring me comfort."
email, jan 2006: "tomorrow i will go to work on the subway. on the subway i will stand next to the door and sway until my stop comes. my eyes will be closed and i will imagine i am in new york, or in hades, or minneapolis. we all know minneapolis. when the doors open i will remember seoul. i will ascend some steps and walk through a turnstyle. there will be other people going to work, and as i ascend the steps out of the subway terminal i will be greeted by a woman hawking christian magazines. i will smile at her and walk towards work. at work it will be the same as it always is and i will enjoy it."
